- By Kalpana Thiyagarajan, Sunnyvale, CA
March 11 of 2021 dawned just like any other day in Chennai. Although residing in the US, I was temporarily in Chennai for family reasons. Despite the clear weather outside, the day started with a sort of emotional turmoil inside. I couldn’t quite place my finger on it as I went through my usual routine of tending to kids and home chores. It was only when I centered myself as I stood in the Puja room with my eyes closed, did I realize what it was. One of my long sought after dreams is currently being fulfilled - ‘I am here! In India! That too, on Shivarathri!’ How have I longed, for years, to be here on this day, or night, whichever way it is put.
As the day passed eventless and the night was born, I could discern a light excitement slowly growing in me. At 10:30 PM, my niece (who happened to have her birthday this day, making it double special) and I took off in her two wheeler. As we travelled, we glimpsed various sized Shiva temples swelling with devotees. Everyone wanted to be a part of this experience! We finally reached our destination - the grand Kabaleeshwar temple in Mylapore.
Kabali temple
The road to the temple was teeming with vehicles, both 2 wheeled and 4 wheeled, trying to get some parking spots. Thankfully we were on a scooter; my niece skillfully navigated the rush and found a spot. We walked up to one entrance of the temple - the crowd only seemed to grow. Still trying to figure this out, we stepped on the broad doorstep of the temple for a better view and was shocked to see throngs of bobbing heads of devotees. Some instinct told me to step back. I wasn’t sure if I could find my way out in this crowd - it looked more like a huge human grinder to me. My niece who is a veteran in Shivarathri experience exclaimed that she hadn’t witnessed anything like this before.
We were back on the scooter having instantly fallen back to Plan B - an ancient temple in Chennai, called Maruntheeswarar, in Thiruvanmiyur.
Detour to parent’s home
Having realized that I didn’t have my warm water bottle with me (without which I don’t go anywhere), I decided to drop over at my parents place in Adyar which was enroute to our new destination. My father gingerly opened the door wondering who on earth would come knocking at 11:30 PM. My pleasantly surprised family now managed to convince us to visit a local Shiva temple called Rathnagirishwarar (my mother is a regular here) where the procedures are no less elaborate. Apparently, Plan B would have the same outcome of Plan A!
Letting circumstances guide us, we then proceeded to this smaller temple. Again the same bobbing heads in the entrance. How we managed to cross this sea of humanity, I can’t imagine, but cross we did. Stepping onto the outer sanctum of the temple, the second surprise of the night awaited us - there wasn’t much crowd! At least it was manageable. My mother introduced us to her temple buddies and ensured that they would keep an eye on me.
The Abhishegam begins
After my parents left, around midnight, my niece and I settled down in a comfortable spot and saw the first of the abhishegams (ritual bathing, there are four of them every hour). I could sense the air crackling with the intensify of the vibration of the Sanskrit chants even as I had a wonderful view of the shivalingam being bathed. I closed my eyes as I continued to absorb the happenings. Despite the activity around me, I was able to settle into a meditative state easily and maintain myself for a considerable amount of time. Simply powerful to say the least!
Prasadams and breaks
Every hour of abhishegam was followed by a break of prasadam for the devotee. After the initial rush, my niece and I stepped to the side of the temple premises where the prasadam was handed out. We didn’t feel like eating but just stayed out in the open, near the temple cow and her calf. For the next couple hours, we relaxed in the fresh air while being able to listen to the powerful Sanskrit chants.
Between discussing stories of Shiva and singing songs of our own, we were able to pass away the time most resourcefully. The last abhishegam at 4 am was fast approaching and we decided to sit in this time
Drowsy!!
Now came our biggest challenge. As we stared at the projector (we had to give other devotees the chance to view the abhishegam) of the inner sanctum of the Lord, both of us struggled to keep our eyes open. At one point, she left for the open space outside to walk the sleep off. I stayed put and tried talking to my mother’s friend about the different procedures being performed there. It was an elephantine effort to shake off the sleep - the closest I could relate to was when I was jet lagged. I finally endured and was rewarded with being able to capture a bottle of the consecrated water (this water was blessed by a week long chantings and had to be sprinkled all over the home to transfer the powerful energies stored in it).
Final Alangaaram
After 5 AM, the curtains closed for both Shiva and his consort. The priests were busy doing an elaborate alangaaram (ritualistic dressing) for the Lord. We waited patiently outside, all sleep gone, our only aim now to see the Shivalinga once the curtains open. The priests outside were still continuing the chants keeping the resonance going. Finally when the curtains were waved aside, the throng of devotees leapt forward. I gazed upon the wonderful decoration of the Shivalinga. The lights in the inner sanctum were switched off and the Lord could only be seen by the light of the dozens of lamps lit around him.
I felt an overwhelming sense of satisfaction and humility for having come thus far in the night - nothing could have been better! This feeling drenched me completely as I took Shiva’s blessings from the Deeparadhanai (worship with the lamp) before walking out of the temple with a supreme sense of bliss.
Afterwards and after effects
I was told to stay awake till 6 PM that day (March 12) after which I could sleep to obtain the best effects of the nighttime activity. I found that I could manage till at least 2 PM after which my mind and body caved in for a brief afternoon nap. An indescribable feeling stayed with me for a few days hence - I could discern a huge sense of confidence (where self control is concerned) and definitely loads more energy.
Next time, whenever I get to experience this, I know the minute changes I would make. For example, reducing indulgence a few days earlier coupled with more yoga sadhanas. Until the next time happens, I will eternally be grateful for this singular divine experience.